From: hiddndancr@aol.com (HiddnDancr)
Subject: ASSC: AFTSD - Observations
Date: 2 Dec 1997 21:18:19 GMT



I'm happy to be a part of AFTSD for my first in what may turn into a series of

diary-like posts.  Enjoy.



Things you should know:

Identifying names and places may be changed to protect the innocent...and the

guilty.

Please don't bother trying to email me.  For reasons that will probably become

clear, I prefer to remain anonymous.



__________

I've been dancing professionally for just under a year, and it certainly has

been an educational experience.  As a woman-lovin'-woman (read:  I'm gay, been

with men, never liked it, end of story) I've found that in general, I (and

other women like me) have a great deal less hostility towards customers and men

in general than our heterosexual co-workers.  One theory I've heard is that

since we don't go home to men after dancing for them all day, in some ways we

don't take it home.  For me, not dealing with any kind of boyfriend or husband

seems to make it easier at times.



I like most of my customers.  Generally, they are decent, hardworking people. 

A smaller percentage I actually find interesting to have in-depth conversations

with.   Somewhere in that group too are the ones I find myself getting lost

with and thoroughly enjoying the chemistry and sexual tension between us.  Yes,

Virginia, there *is* a Santa Claus...and just because I'm gay doesn't mean that

my body shuts off when I'm physically and emotionally stimulated, be it via

male, female, or someone in between. 



Some of the character traits I do not care for in a customer:  

*insensitivity 

(Have you had kids?  Gee, you look like it)

*rudeness 

(I'll give you $40 if you blow me)

*guilt-trippers 

(But I even gave you my lunch money!  Can't you stay?)

*manipulation 

(You're so

(I'm a: VIP/wearing an expensive suit/famous and I just gave you [insert $$

here]...what do you mean I have to stop trying to finger your pussy?!?)



The customers I love are:

*respectful

*good-natured

*responsive

*interesting

*understanding



Notice that I did not include rich in this category.  If I enjoy someone, I'm

going to spend time with them even if they're not a high-roller type.  Sure,

it's terrific when someone is fun and gives me a lot of money...but those

things don't always go together.  If someone makes me feel good, most of the

time I will stay with them for awhile regardless.  



Sometimes, of course, that just doesn't happen.  If I've had endless rejection,

no money or one icky experience after another, some nights it really gets to me

and it's almost impossible to give extra to folks.  Other times, on a bad shift

a pleasant person is a salvation and I'll practically pay *them* to sit with

me.



I like what I do for a living.  This might sound stupid, but I have a sense of

pride about whatever work I choose to do.  It's important to me to try as best

I can to have and to give an enjoyable experience for everyone involved.  For

me, spending more time and energy with someone is almost always more preferable

to me than spending less.  



Notice I said "almost."  When these things happen, the "more is more"

philosophy definitely does not apply:



Hair pulling.  

Digit insertion when I've clearly said no more than once.

Biting.  

"Accidentally" leaving a small, yet visible, hickey. 

Pinching.

Rubbing my skin so hard that it hurt afterward.

Really wet licking.

Continuous requests for fucking/sucking etc.



Then there are the fun and wonderful guys, which so far have outnumbered the

shitheads by a lot.  The older, quiet gentlemen who adore young lovely women

and treat us with elegance and class.  The working-class guys with grease under

their nails but freshly showered, shaved, and ready to part with some

hard-earned dollars to grope a pretty girl in good, clean fun.  The ones that

are so comfortable in who they are that I am immediately at ease and ready,

sometimes, to give them more than what they asked for.  The ones that tell me

I'm beautiful, that my husband/boyfriend is the luckiest guy alive, that they

really enjoyed their time with me and I could see that they meant it.



My last shift was really difficult.  Very little interest in me, it

seemed...and of course when that happens I sit around and wonder about other

girls.  What does she have that I don't?  Is she giving this guy "extra

service?"  What did she say to him that I didn't?  I'm just too

boring/unattractive/unsuited for this job.  



Those are the tough times.  If I can go back the next day with my head held

high, and still enjoy my work then I think I'm doing a damn good job.



That's it for now.  Thanks for listening.