From: DragonFly @swamp.wet (*DragonFly*)
Subject: ASSC AFTSD --  --  What's not to like?

What's not to like about strip clubs?  After all, I keep going back, so I must like them.  There are
lots of guys there almost every time I go to a place, so they must like them.  Right?  

It must be the $4.50 sodas.  Or the $6 beers.  That's probably it.  At that price, they sure do
taste good.

Or maybe it's the dancers with vocabularies that seem to consist entirely of "Wanna dance?"  I have
found a few who can make it as far as "So what do you do?"  I'm sure they're just making
conversation, not sizing up my spending potential like some cynics would have you believe.  I think
I'm going to rotate between musician, mechanic, and my real job just to show that there is no
difference in the reaction.

Or it could be the decor.  I just love those wobbly chairs and the ripped upholstery,  makes me feel
right at home.  The sticky floor is a real bonus, too.  And how about the sagging couches.  They've
thought of everything!

And, oh, how could I forget the sight of those babes on stage smacking their gum,  The subliminal
image of cows and their cud just gets me hot, hot, hot, hot, hot!!!!  Even better when the blow and
pop bubbles, makes me think of another blow they could do. But I digress.

It could be the dancers who sit and talk about their co-workers and loser boyfriends.  I just love
getting those personal details.  Makes me feel like a part of their lives.  Now if I could just get
a phone number that works.

I bet it's the feeling of satisfaction when I hand over the money after a set of dances.  I think
it's really great that a gal with no useful skills can pull down the equivalent of 4 too 5 days of
my take home pay in just a few hours.  That is so cool!  Imagine, at $10 and $30 a dance (the going
rates depending on where you are and what you're getting in LA), the hourly rates for a 4 minute
song are $150 to $450 per hour.  Pretty good for a gal with no skills.

But every time I start feeling taken by the whole thing, when negative ions invade my space, when
cynicism starts a-creepin', I get back in touch through the power of ASS-C.  Just a quick scan of
the news group or a chat on IRC and I'm back in the groove and ready and raring to go.  The best
part of IRC is that dancers are there to selflessly give of themselves and inform us of their
schedules, pick us up when we're feeling blue (How many times has "Well, why don't you come and see
ME and get some laps, that'll make you feel better" just lifted me right out of my melancholy?  It's
miraculous, I tell you!), and just renew my faith in the whole system.  Where would I be without it?

ASS-C is a bit like an anti-support group.  All those silly support groups are trying to help you
give this up, let that go, get over the other thing.  Not so with ASS-C.  Renew, revitalize, revamp!
I know I play an important part in the Strip Club food chain.  Without guys like me, where would
these gals be?  Struggling along as unskilled labor for minimum wage?  Secretaries?  Bah.  Because
of guys like us, they can hold their heads high as they are worshipped as goddesses, afford the
finer things in life (like those expensive medicines so many of them seem to need), and enjoy a
rewarding employment experience.

So I tip my hat and raise a glass to ASS-C.  Keep up the good work, boys and girls!!!

*DragonFly*